Trite you might say

Can there be some more overused trite phrases floating around?  Things I am really sick of hearing:… the real deal – it is nauseatingly overused to explain a professional athlete actually being a superstar rather just than just being on a hot streak.  It can also be used to describe your ex-wife as in … “She divorced Bob because he kept shoving her vibrator up his own ass but now that she is single, she’s the real deal.  Just buy her dinner and at a minimum, you get road head on the drive home from the restaurant.  Heck of a deal.”
 

… think outside the box – it means to try a new way of thinking but is now used by every dipshit manager to his/her employees when he wants them to do something well beyond their IQ level.  It can also mean to try to think of a new licking pattern on your woman when she won’t come any longer from the same up/down, side/side, nuzzle, nuzzle, squeeze-her-ass routine you’ve been repeating on her since 1999.  You know … thinking outside the “box”.
 

… just saying … – oh fuck this one is annoying.  Very passive/aggressive as you get to say or type anything rude, obnoxious, or disruptive and by adding a ‘just saying’ at the end of it you get to back off from the effects by claiming you were just saying it (and by assumption, not meaning it).
 

… it is what it is … – no shit pimpstick, how could it be something else?  This is generally used by someone when they have been insulted or called out by someone else and then the press ask how they feel about it.  You know the person would love to say “Fuck him, the little cockbreath can fuck himself” … but they regress to “What can I say, it is what it is”.
 

… absolutely – this word is an adverb.  It is not an answer of one direction or another.  Some people think it means yes, but it can’t mean yes because “absolutely no way” must mean “yes no way” which makes no goddamn sense.  Now if a guy says to a girl … “you want to blow me?” and she says “absolutely”, just pull your pants down and shut the hell up … but otherwise make sure people provide a proper response.  I like giving the answer “absolutely maybe” when asked a question as it throws everyone off.  It’s sort of like having a shirt size of ‘extra medium’ as it provides an accelerator factor to the middle of something.  Fucks them all up.
 

Oh I’m sure there will be some more trite sayings to hit this page soon because, you know, like I amamazing at literally getting down to brass tax on these type of things.  No worries if I am like really late on updating because at the end of the day, it’s my bad because I need to put my two cents in as this stuff is not rocket science.  I’ll be proactive and with that being said, I’ll be a happy camper if I can bemoving forward with my updates.

They will continue to be literally inappropriate and you may be offended but fuck off if you are … just saying.

Whatever.