Let’s tidy this stuff up.

No health rants for awhile … Buster just wants to eat, sleep, take long walks and piss on all of the mailbox poles.

We need to combine and merge some religions as there are too many in the world.  I’m not sure how many (let’s say 250) … so there are 250 too many.  We need to be smart and bring everyone closer together as it seems they can be quite divisive.

So we need to borrow an idea from India on Arranged-Marriages.  This works well in their culture as your parents align you with a mate based on a variety of factors more sustainable to longevity and it is a marriage of families to an extent – as opposed to the American way of marrying the first girl who will blow you.

But we need to modify the idea just a bit as Arranged-Marriages will never work here as your dad doesn’t know jack-shit about anything.  But he can probably identify with being miserable while living with a three-toed sloth so I say we tweak it just a tad and start implementing Arranged-Divorces.  You call your dad, he calls her dad – they work it out.  No lawyers, no bullshit.  Cut me a deal dad and make up for being a dick my whole life.

Combine Catholicism with the Mormons – those nutty Catholics can’t seem to break free from the pedophilia scandal and the pale-ass Mormons need to get out of Salt Lake at some point.  It seems like a good plan to finally let the priests marry as logic does dictate – that based on the current criteria – the rules of being a priest are mildly counterintuitive.  So you let the priests marry but they can only marry a nun – but by joining with the Mormons, you allow the priests to marry as many nuns as they want.  You probably have to sift through several nuns a night to find anything – Sally Field as The Flying Nun and Julie Andrews in The Sound of Music are your above average looking nuns.  The Mormons will get the Catholic global distribution network.  Perfect match.

And the Jehovah Witness clan needs to merge with the US Post Office.  Obviously the internet is killing the volume of mail being delivered as they are stopping Saturday delivery and closing post offices.  The strange little people in the Jehovah Witness world are already going door to door … let’s just strap a mail bag on them and combine this shit.  We cut millions out of the federal deficit and the whacky Jehovah’s get a wider net to talk their nonsense.  They could slip that stupid Watchtower pamphlet inside your mail and you might actually open the door for them.

“Ding dong”

… Yes

Can I talk to you about the lord?

… No

I have your mail.

… Ahhh shit – get on with it then

Buster is going out for walk now.