Amateur storm chasers are the weirdest people on the planet. They drive around all spring looking for big clouds so they can turn on their video camera and film tornadoes.
Maybe they do some good and getting some fresh air has to help them but please, turn off the microphone or put the video camera on mute because the running commentary from these goofy bastards when they see a tornado is dumb as shit.
First off, when they see a tornado or a big bad batch of clouds, they talk like they have a degree in Meteorology with a minor in Advanced Science. When in actuality, the only time they’ve seen a college is when they thought they saw a ‘big cloud’ on the radar near State U or the temp agency they work for placed them on a three day gig to clean up after commencement.
And when they see a tornado, they talk like they are the first people on the planet to have ever seen one with their running excited commentary. The guy with the camera talks as if we can’t see the tornado.
- There’s a tornado on the ground right in front of us!!! It’s right in front of us. It’s a tornado!!!
No shit ass-eyes, we see it.
And the second or third dumbass in the car is always barking orders in the background to the driver about what to do. Head north … watch it … pull back … not too close … we have an echo hook on the radar … shut the fuck up — all of you.
Though they would deny it, they do want to video a tornado blast right through a housing complex blowing shit and people all over the place. The more houses exploding and animals flying around, the better they feel. No one would spend weeks driving around Kansas just to see a tornado spin around in a cornfield.
Sometimes these knuckleheads are the first on the scene to some tornado destruction – do they get out and help? Hell no … they drive around and video the carnage with over the top statements like … wowwwww … oh my gawwddddd … look at this … everything is gone … wowwww … (under their breath, they are saying “Where are the dead people and can one of them have like a piece of straw embedded in his skull?)
We need the ultimate video where a tornado grabs a car full of these half-baked Spielbergs and as they spin at 200 MPH, you can hear one of the say … … wowwwww … oh my gawwddddd … look at this … wowwww …
Now I’d watch that one.
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